Something's coming

When I woke up yesterday morning, something had changed. I had been waiting for it, and knew that it would hit soon, but was unsure exactly when. A very precise but hard-to-define feeling: as of yesterday, everything I do is about performing my recital. It's almost a physical sensation. Chores and studying and work are either an irritating interruption or welcome distraction from practicing. If I'm online I'm either avoiding the piano or taking a well-deserved break. If I'm not thinking about the music itself, I'm humming or mindlessly tapping it on my knee. I'm very inwardly focused, which makes me seem rude and selfish (some of you might not note much of a difference). I'm reminded a bit of a certain skier/triathlete I know, the morning of a race. Except—lucky Eric—I'm still more than three weeks away from the event.

No comments: